spring cleaning
“ … take a look at me cuz i could not care at all … do or die … you'll never make me … cos the world, will never take my heart … though you try, you'll never break me … we want it all, we wanna play this part … wont explain or say i'm sorry … im not ashamed, i'm gonna show my scar … Give a cheer for all the broken … listen here, because it's only… i'm just a man, i'm not a hero … just a boy, whos meant to sing this song … just a man, i'm not a hero … i, don't, care …”
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Yes, back to writing random scribble of thoughts, hopes and dreams. If it seems to be that, in some people’s minds and eyes that my attempts to write down what my mind is thinking appears to come off as being pretencious, cheem (deep), deep, complicated and abstract just for the sake of being so, 2 words for you: - Fuck Off.
Indeed, the mind is a bizarrea and somewhat complicated place, and if my thoughts were expressed in this matter, disjointed, abstract and what have you not, simply put it’s my damn thoughts and that would be the best way to explain things.
My blog wasn’t meant to garner an audience, neither was it to write about the mundane (well at time) …
Everything is the same ol same ol, I wouldn’t say that I am working at this juncture, more like just in the office. It appears to be that I have everyone’s dream job, in all fairness it does fuck you up after awhile (try 3 months). And it’s not very reassuring to be reassured that “You don’t have to worry about anything” or “It takes time” or “Things will pick up sooner or later”. There’s this impending guilt that prohressively build up inside of you, to the extent that it manifest into some conspiracy drivened, alterior motive reason as to why you would be working here.
I don’t plan to jump ship, unless I was made to walk the plank. It’s something new to me so what’s the point of hopping here and there, it be a waste of time on both parties and eventually, nothing will be learnt.
I just have this feeling now that I am being pulled in so many different directions, like people are telling me what to do and shit, and in a way it does alter your mindset and perspective on situations, choices and situations. Yes,
I am old enough to make some of this unwanted clutter slide off me, at times you do feel bulletproof, and at times you feel like you’re just a time bomb ticking. You’d be lying to say that these things wouldn’t dog you, we’re only human afterall, so I guess it be a passing phase .. as usual ..
So was that plain English enough for you?
Indeed, the mind is a bizarrea and somewhat complicated place, and if my thoughts were expressed in this matter, disjointed, abstract and what have you not, simply put it’s my damn thoughts and that would be the best way to explain things.
My blog wasn’t meant to garner an audience, neither was it to write about the mundane (well at time) …
Everything is the same ol same ol, I wouldn’t say that I am working at this juncture, more like just in the office. It appears to be that I have everyone’s dream job, in all fairness it does fuck you up after awhile (try 3 months). And it’s not very reassuring to be reassured that “You don’t have to worry about anything” or “It takes time” or “Things will pick up sooner or later”. There’s this impending guilt that prohressively build up inside of you, to the extent that it manifest into some conspiracy drivened, alterior motive reason as to why you would be working here.
I don’t plan to jump ship, unless I was made to walk the plank. It’s something new to me so what’s the point of hopping here and there, it be a waste of time on both parties and eventually, nothing will be learnt.
I just have this feeling now that I am being pulled in so many different directions, like people are telling me what to do and shit, and in a way it does alter your mindset and perspective on situations, choices and situations. Yes,
I am old enough to make some of this unwanted clutter slide off me, at times you do feel bulletproof, and at times you feel like you’re just a time bomb ticking. You’d be lying to say that these things wouldn’t dog you, we’re only human afterall, so I guess it be a passing phase .. as usual ..
So was that plain English enough for you?
posted by pos @ 10:39
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