Indeed

I would have to raise my hand and say it, I am in a funk.

Many issues, circumstances, situations and chain of events, on my own doing and external forces have been contributing to this, be it intangible or intangible.

To be honest, everything is just looking grey and dull; everything has lost it’s it’s colour, in tensity and luster. Enthusiasm for the routine has and everything else that comes along with it seems to be waning.

I know people have been either, trying to verbally slap some sense into me, or for that matter, talk some sense into me. I appreciate that. And some have been reiterating to me what I have been saying to them. Which I guess they are trying to help, but in the end, it just seems to be slapping me even harder in the face.

I know nothing can be out of one’s control unless you let it or want it to be. But at this juncture the feeling is otherwise, Which idiot would want to beat himself up in this way?

And if I could, I would, but I can’t, and that goes without saying.

____

It may seem late, but thank you ...
“In my sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night

While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight

You never doubted my warped opinions on things like …

You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take

So I guess I’ll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind?

And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind?”