Sunday Afternoon

Now Playing: Ben Harper - Burn One Down














Yesh, there we were, on a rainsoaked, sun-cameo appearanced sunday afternoon. The scene: Finals of the interhouse soccer compeition. Sad to say my kampung lost, but in true loser fashion I'd whine right now; tyhe match was rigged from the start. KELONG!!! if that rings a bell, evidentally the ref from the same housing as the opposing team, fair enough?
On another notes, was a funny experience and feeling, felt as though we at some marsh in England watching a sunday league kickabout, and pseudo coaches smoking and yelling by the side, giving our 2 cents worth of tactical knowledge, ah well ... better luck next year ....

HELL YeA!!!

Now Playhing: Jay Z – Dirt of Your Shoulder

HELL MUTHAFUCK’N YEA!!! Weekends here… good thing as that, as you know of my rather fucked up week that was.

After that comical entry by someone that was vandalizing my blog, it’s back to normal, mundane stuff…

End To Da Drama….
Well, as you know that incident I had with afew dickheads (I think I’m entitled to labeled them now), there is closure now.

I went to see my lecturer about this as I was not to keen on doing the presentation, being in the same room with them was already draining enough. Anyways, I had come to point where I was willing to forfeit the marks for the presentation. Well, my lecturere, Kyle was rather supportive of me, which is rather suprising as most of the time tutors would be sitting in the fence with stuff like this.

In fact, he was fully supportive of me, he said that he noticed the body language of my group and gave me afew permutations as todo with the presentation, which is quite arelief, can’t elaborate on what it is as it would defat the purpse of it .

Anyways, thanks guys for the support, don’t know what I’d do … BIG UPS!!!!

WOOHOOO!!!! THE WEEKEND!!!!!

Contributing Writer: The babe arrives n departs

"After weeks e babe finally graced me with her presence.

The initial gastronomy plan of eating at Chao Italia turned into a take away junk food binge ... thanks to Mr Hungry Jacks. Blame e bad weather, blame e bad sense of directions of the driver & blame e dodgy lightings of Perth.

departs in an hours time back to her affluent area of UWA..."

All These things That I've Done...

Now Playing: Oasis – Whatever

Current msn nick: IDLC© - mix bag of goodies: pissed, shitty, frustrated, disappointed, drained

I’m not stealing a page outta my friend’s blog with that nick thing but it’s the best way to describe what I’m feeling right now…

As you know of my units that I’m doing right now and the debacle that entailed, together with that reflective piece that I’ve written? Well, I take it all bad. I’m glad what I wrote after what has transpired today ….

We were suppose to meet outside of the room wgere we were to discuss whatever that was to be discussed. I was seating down chatting to my friend outside. As people who know me well enough would know that I won’t recognize you even if you were standing infront of me, maybe I would if I;ve known you long enough to recognize your body language. This incident happened twice when firstly they didn’t even acknowledge that it was them, the second time it was when I walked into the room and at that point I didn’t know it was them because there is usually a class before mine, and this was before I knew it was them. So I walked into the room and they didn’t even say anything tome, like it was them or something, so I walked outta the room. I only realized that it was the, when my other groupmate walked in. I don’t know why they dn’t say anything, like they don’t fucking hell know that I’ve got a handicap.

We were suppose to type out some stuff and well they let me do a token part of writing a mere paragraph, so I asked them what I should write and one of the mo fo’s said, “Oh why are you asking me what you shoul write?” Well, did that shitarse paragraph.

I don’t what people skills my lecturer has, he is a nice guy but this really made me so uncomfortable and insignificant, he basically said it out loud to my group, “Have you spoken to Ian yet?” as though I was panel on the wall.

And well, the lecturer did tell me that I had good writhing skills and all that to them, I don’t know whether they did it on purpose but they basically did all the things that I could do. Really felt like smacking this one bastard when he said that, “You could barely write that paragraph what makes you think you can write anything else?” and this paragraph I neede help for referencing on the screen.

It’s times like thses I wonder whether it’s my gawd damn fault.. everything and anything…… sigh …..

WTF ...

Now Playing: Sam Cooke – Don’t Know Much About History

Now I’ve seen and heard everything I think in one of my earlier entries I said that I was in trouble with one of my units? Yea, "Like the nipples of a Japanese business man in an S&M club, there is yet another twist.“

Well, I did went to see the unit coordinator with regards to what was in his email, the tone to which sonded as though I was this close of getthing debarred from the unit as I did feel I didn’t really contributed enough in the unit and was justified that he would send me such an email.

However, I was rather stumped to hear from him that mygroupmates were actually worried that I was offended that THEY weren’t letting me contribute even more. I mean, WTF?? Erm, I’ve always gotten the sharp end of things when it comes to matters concerning groupwork, to which it usually works itself out by me just talking directly to trhe lecturers, rather than dealing with some mo fo’s that I’ve come across during groupwork.

So, I left his offive with asigh of relief (of course) and also rather embarrassed, not only for this situation that transpired but also that I handed in a journal/reflective style sorta assignment that was part of this unit. Now I’m wondering whther I was too harsh and bitch. So I thought I’d might as well blog that assignment…..



Business Capstone 301
Reflections On My Participation

Name: Ian Ming Xiang, Da Luz campos
Student Number: 13002329
Date of Submission: 24th October, 2005

Reflections on my participation

1) My collaboration
Initially, just like any other unit that I’ve done in Curtin University that involves group work, I usually would hold my breath as to whom and what sort of personalities that would be in a group as I’ve often found it rather hard to get my views across effectively due to my known limitations.
So, as this was a group oriented unit, as I usually do in the beginning of every unit, was to let my groupmates know of my visual impairment, letting them know that there are limitations, visually as to work that I could see or do. Often I have felt, and I still do that this would this would be the most awkward and uncomfortable part in initiating groupwork.
However, I have come into a state of mind where I always say to myself that I’m not dumb and that there are many other ways I can contribute to the group in whole, but as I have discovered in this unit even some of the basic procedures are already an obstacle.
2) My contribution
The reason for me in enrolling in this unit was the curiosity and challenge of being placed in a real time scenario where every single decision, action or there lack of would affect the group not only in the short run, but in the long run. It also gave everyone, at a glance as to the mechanics and factors that goes into running a manufacturing enterprise, though in a controlled, closed environment
Also, there was the challenge of being able to pip your wits against my fellow peers, rather than the university itself, was also another compelling factor.
As the workload at the start of the simulation was rather heavy, our group did get organized from the start and we did so by dividing out the work equally. Each member was given a product line to be in charged of, whereby the individual had a final say into the inputs of that product. Each group member was to also examine the other group member’s product as well as other areas of the business.
We were to meet an hour before each tutorial to discuss and input and discuss our decisions, we were also to meet before the dateline at the end of the week, to finalise our decisions. If we couldn’t make it for each meeting, we were to email our findings as well as a brief summary so as to explain our decisions.
I would admit there are instances where I have not attended these meetings due to medical reasons or other prior academic commitments or otherwise. There were also incidents where I felt I couldn’t get my points across as it is virtually impossible for me to see the figures that are on the monitor. Initially, my groupmates were helpful enough to point out to me what was on the screen or what section or segment we were discussing but this was often difficult during seminar time as there were our ’competitors’ around us. Towards the end of the simulation I did feel that the group did not really bother in assisting me and I felt that they didn’t really bother and so was my waning enthusiasm.
Was my input important? After going though all the rounds I felt that my contribution and ideas were totally disregarded. I did feel that there were individuals in the group that had a bigger say and far more knowledge in the field of finance and accounting to get their views across. It’s also common sense not to fix something that isn’t broken and not to disturb the status quo.
With my lack of an effective way of explaining my point of view as stated above, as well as having groupmates that are far more competent in this field, I simply became frustrated and felt that I was marginalized to the point where I felt that I wasn’t really needed anymore and, in my opinion saw no reason in making the effort to do anything about it anymore.
I know that this is a negative way of seeing things and a letdown to groupwork and it doesn’t condone my actions for being absent at a critical stage of the unit.
3) What I need to improve on to become an effective team member
Through the countless group oriented work that I’ve done though my academic life I’ve found little joy on them. I whether by saying that I have a handicap does hinder group dynamics, alter people’s notion or perception about me, or is just down to me as a person. I am still looking for better ways and means to get around this obstacle.

I don’t think that my strengths came to the fore at all in this unit but in general I do feel that I have good people skills, having good oranisational skills, also being able to come up with good and creative ideas, as well as leadership qualities that is often does not come out.
My main weakness would be I guess lacking the confidence and also the courage to communicate my concerns, ideas and point of view across when there are far more competent people around me. I think my other weakness would be to communicate to a group as I d feel that I do have a problem, seeing that I am able to communicate far more effectively on a person to person basis. I also think that I should learn not to simply shut down when there is a problem as I think this where the misconceptions of me starts to be conceived.

uh-Huh..

Now Playing: Blur – Crazy Beat

I don’t what is more flattering: that people do actually read mt 2 cents worth of peace of mind, or that this sorry excuse of a blogpage can be hit by blogspam … yet another way of direct markting, how low will they go…

Afew thoughts

Now Playing: Barber's Adagio For Strings (Tiesto mix)

It's All In My Head

Demon’s sprouting it’s horns again. At this point I’m on the verge of hitting the self-destruct button again; not giving a toss about anything and everything. It’s the usual shit that happens, how I wish it isn’t now and not in that particular field. Sigh, as the song goes, “”Whatcha gonna do when the shit hits the fan?”

Bon Voyage
Journeys oof life where you wish everyting would remain the status quo, you sometimes just wish things would remain looped in that prid of time.














To Sindie; Have a good and safe time in Bali gurl ;o) .. gonna miss you and your honesty and a whole lotta unmentionables… lol.. pleasure to have come across ya once upon atime, see ya soon .. ;)

@$&^%*!!!! (was thinking more along the lines of "bytching")

Now Playing: Coldplay – Stars

I’m just gonna fuck’n bitch on this entry. It’s coming to the end of the semester and to be frank can’t wait for this to fucking end.

This semester academically been okay, would have to say that I shoulda/coulda put in a little more effort and commitment into some of the work (yes it’s me talking here), but I guess life is full of regrets and hindsight is always 20/20.

Well, for starters I think one of my tutors is a bonafied bitch, will not name names for liability reasons but really, I think she’s got something against Asian students. Kinda getting this vibe cos she simply just keeps on chatting up the caucs during tuts and fucking hell she ends every conversation with me with this muthafucking condescending sounding line of “Do you understand?” or “Do you know what I mean?”. Fucking bytch, I’m in communications unit and degree, of course I’d get what the fuck you’re squaking about (literally).

Same unit, some freak’n prick accused me of plagerism. No accuse would be a tamer word to use, more like said that I did do it. “Good speech, I couldn’t find anything on the internet to do with this speech so I assumed you wrote it by yourself and so I marked it on your nerit” went something like that that was comment on the marking sheet. I mean it’s just fucking rude.

Lastly, received an email from my lecturer for one of my tuts about my lack of sommitment to my work as according to my groupmates. To be honest he’s got a valid point. However, my side of the story would be that I’ve simply lost interest in participating in it, don’t get me wrong, was full of enthu when I enrolled in this unit and was contributing in the beginning But as time passé I felt that I was being marguinalised, my ideas weren’t necessarily met with great zeal and it was basically ignored as being too ott This I guess escalated to me being frustrated and hence the lack of interest. I don’t see the point of me putting in the work and not being acknowledged for it, so whats the point of doing it in the end? And I’m not making this as an excuse but my lack of vison has got something to do with it, not being able to participate and to see what the rest can see is something that sounds like a brolen ecorder of osrts these days.

So like visiting the staffroom after school in the good ol primary/secondary school days, I goota see the lecturer about this shit.

Life could be abit better at this point ..

Next entry; I’ll keep you in suspense.. stay tune kids!

Backlogged

Now Playing: Ben Lee – Catch My Disease

OK, it’s been awhile since I last wrote an entry. I DID try writing one afew weeks back but bloody blogger hung again (starting to get quite cheesed off with their platform). Anywyas, can’t sleep as usual, will get to that …. Thus my usual ritual to curb insanity and boredom …

Trip Back
As most of you people would already know, was in Singapore for the week off (and no, it wasn’t a vacation at all as most of you would think of it). Yea yea yea, it was one of my ‘jetsetting/fleeting/ zooming in and out’ trip. When I say this is ‘cos some people think it’s abit of joke because I’m always around when I’m not, go figure. Not that I’m complaining to have gone back for the week, it was for legitimate reasons anywho.

As usual, induldged in chicken rice, not to the optimum level but boleh tahan til I get back at the end of November (fleeting RIGHT?). And much to the relief of Kevin and dames, I did not induldge in my other gastronomical adventures, PRATA!!! .. ah !! , but we’ve got about 3 months for that when I get back guys, brace yourselves … haha

Anyways, arrived back in isle, dumped my stuff and headed straight to Evan’s and Vic’s birthday gathering at Serena’s (apologise for not buying the wind lah, paiseh). It was a complete 180 degree change from the usual birthday gatherings that the PFL crew would have, mellow by our standards but I was happy to be back and the bottle of wine to myself no less.

Saturday night, first off, was Auntie Kim’s house warming, her new pie in he sky, somewhere along Bukit Timah, cool digs. And then, it was off to Shaun ‘Sahunneh’ James “Jalto?” Jalleh’s birthday at his crib, his passage to adulthood is complete, where everytging and anyting goes downhill from then on .. haha, was yet another mellow, alcohol filled night, ermbut I don’t think my uncle and auntie appreciated us doing a congo at 3 a.m. in the morning to Buena Vista Social Club’s Guantanmera, good times nonetheless. And yes, b’day boy got his revenge on me, I had to clean after him (his whole room smelt like 3 day old Bolognese sauce… nevermind). But I’m not the one to bear a grudge cos I did get the satisfaction of bitch slapping him, hahah,,, PSCYCHED!
The week that entailed the weekend was kinda quiet, was left to my own vices most of the time, revisited few of my usual eating haunts, went househunting with Dames and his parents, I must say that some of the houses are designed rather innovatively, that whole genre of contemporary, modern Singaporean ot Balinese architecture(??!! Wah, adcilly spell collect in da furst time).

Friday, the reason why I came back for the week: My grandmother’s birthday, was nice to have everyone again, though I seriously can’t remember theire names half of the time. Can’t really blame, I see the extended family like what?? Twice a year at the most?? But I’m getting there though, starting to remember more names now. However, it was nice to see her happy and yet another good reason to get sloashed again and it was also quite amusing sitting on the ‘golf kaki’ table, just listening Richard hou pulling out crap from his arse is worth it. Afterthat, it was off to Paulander Brauhaus at millennia (*ahaem*, where only Enzo’s Ferreri get to park free, why the fuck siah?/ what if you drive a Bentley or something? .. such snobs.. tsk) with few of mom’s friends (well, basically my adult friends now lah). The brew was excellent, had a litre pint of that specially brewed October fest lager/ale, smooth and it didn’t reallt sit on the belly.

Saturday night, went for that Cirque de Soleil performances. Hmmm, I don’t know whether it be me to be eaily awestruck but it was just entertainging, or maybe cos I’m just freak’n blind… ah well.

Afterthat, didn’t really wanred to waste my Saturday night, or what was left of it at home. So russled up dames and Kevin and we hit the town, we didn’t start with a bang, more like our tails between our legs. First off, we went to the Gallery, and on most nights Coccolatte is a sausage fest, and it was no different again. So, feeling realy desperate not to kill the night, we went down to Clarke Quay to see if we could snaek into Gotham, but to no avail, we were scraping the bottem already, even contemplathing going to m Mo’s (can you say Robin Lllleeee-ong kids). But alas, good things comes to those who wait, we ened up at living room bar at the
Back in the groove
Adter that night, was one more family dinner and I was back in Perth by Monday afternoon.

Been a rather shitty week so ar, next thing I knew when I came back I was hit with a viral infection, so I was in bed for most of the week in a horixontal, hallucinating sorta coma. There wasn’t cries of ‘bang my hea aganst the wall’ this time round, but the tamer ones of me being the dude being tied up in Gulliver’sTravel and one other that I can’t remember, but it was weird, like you should be when youre burning up. I’ll say it again as I did say it before, thanks again Dee Dee for the help ///;o)

Ok, I’m finally done, the longest entry I’ve written by far. You’ve been a wonderful audience this morning.

Word Count: 1.055 E F F O R T L E S S L Y.. wish I could say that about my uni work these days.. argh